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「最後の聖戦!?」中村うさぎ



評価:3/5(普通におもしろい)

「何にも考えずに頭をぼーっとしたい。派手にお金を使う本なんていいよねー」と思って、前に少しだけ読んだことのあったショッピングの女王シリーズを手に取りました。が、これが良かったのか悪かったのか、なかなか評価に悩む作品になってしまいました。

「お気楽に著者のチャレンジを楽しむ」という読み方は、あんまり出来ないと思います。著者はいろいろチャレンジするのですが、それに対する内省が、私には辛いです。まるで、今の自分や将来の自分を、自分より巧みな筆致で描写されているようで。

 次作の「さすらいの女王」に行くに従って表れる著者の内省が私には興味深いんだけど、辛い。でも、読むのは辞められませんでした。夫に「眉間に皺を寄せてどうしたの?」と何度も聞かれながら、一日ほどで読了です。

「やっぱり人間って本当は「わかりやすいもの」に苦しんでいるものなんだけど、自分が「わかりやすいもの」に苦しんでいるなんて思いたくないから、もっと深遠なものに苦しんでるフリをしちゃうのではないか。そして、「わかりやすいもの」に苦しんでいる他者を見下し軽蔑する……これが私の今までやってきた自己欺瞞である。(中略)私はバカだ。それを忘れたら、私は今より最低の人間になる。」p234

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